ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
