turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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