My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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