Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
