Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
