We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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