Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I woke up under a house in Key West
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