How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
3 2 1 whiskey
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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