their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
