how can u be prego again
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
