I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
