Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Randomize
