I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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