I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Randomize