You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize