Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
