He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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