i jhust puked up my retainher.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
