Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize