He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
