He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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