your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
