It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
