I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Randomize
