I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize