You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
