we're blogging at a bar
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Randomize