I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
