i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
even my farts smell like vagina
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
