try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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