Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
