I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
We have started to decorate penises.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
