she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Randomize
