You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize
