I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
