Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize
