I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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