I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
