billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
