you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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