Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
