omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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