I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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