my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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