should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
