Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
