All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
This house was built for laser tag.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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