went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
