Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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