oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
