Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize