i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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